Have you ever asked yourself what it means to be a man? Have you ever found an answer that sat comfortably with you? 

    As men, we are born into a world that continues to revolve around us. Our male privilege isn’t always easy to see, and it definitely doesn’t mean that as men we all occupy equal positions – but the systems and structures of our societies have been constructed over generations by and for men. This is patriarchy. A word you will rarely find in the media, on the news, or in history books, a word that denotes male control, oppression and violence. 

According to the Cambridge dictionary, patriarchy is defined thus: “…a society controlled by men in which they use their power to their advantage.” 

    But how does patriarchy affect me, especially If I don’t feel like I have any power? The ways in which men benefit from patriarchy, threads its way through every aspect of our lives. Some are hiding in plain view; others are buried much deeper. They have to be sought out, with an open mind and self-compassion; an understanding that through no fault of our own, the ways in which we have been socially conditioned by the world around us leave us capable of causing harm.

The ways in which power is distributed are complex, and it does not put us all into matching boxes. Men can experience disadvantage and oppression in a whole multitude of ways including, but not limited to, Class, Race, Disability and Education.       Patriarchy does not hold all men in high esteem, and we believe that understanding the ways in which different forms of power, privilege and oppression intersect for each individual is important. But we are all part of a patriarchal system, whether we like it or not – a part of you feels the urge to scream out how unfair this sounds, well, women can internalise and enact patriarchy too, in ways that can also cause harm.

But we are not here to blame women; just as we are not here to shame men. This is written by men, for men, because we love women, we love ourselves and we love each other. We acknowledge our roles, our privilege and our pasts, including the harm that we ourselves have caused. We understand that in order to end misogyny; the active hate against women that plagues our societies, we have to take accountability for our actions and enact positive change. After all, patriarchy harms men too. 

As Men Against Patriarchy, we seek to help men by: 

• Providing a safe space for conversation, emotional support and discussion. 

• Holding a feminist viewpoint – one of true equality.

• Educating ourselves and each other using established literature and information.

• Using our own experiences and failings as tools for learning and growth.  

• Holding ourselves and each other accountable, in a constructive way that will help us to reduce harm and promote equality.

• Working to identify and transform harmful thoughts, behaviours and actions.

• Showing kindness, empathy and compassion towards every person involved, as the unique individual that they are. 

• Listening to and working with women and members of the LGBTQI+ community to better understand their experiences of patriarchy and the impacts of our actions as men

• Strive to provide a fully inclusive space that acknowledges intersectionality and the diversity of men’s lived experience.